Negotiation Role Play

I finally had an appointment with orthopedist today to have a look at my ankle. He was unimpressed with my healing and prescribed 6 weeks of physical therapy. I was devastated by the news, which promised several more weeks on crutches and a prolonged healing process.

However, after the morning bad news, the day got significantly better when Seisei, one of the other Fellows, gave a lunch presentation. Instead of giving a formal presentation on the week’s reading assignment, the classic Getting to Yes, she gathered myself, Rebecca, and Jeff, an Insight summer intern, and proposed that we use the time as a training session. We all thought it was a great idea and decided to do a negotiation role-play.

We brainstormed some everyday scenarios and decided to do a simple ‘problem roommate’ situation. Rebecca played the difficult roommate and I played the one who was trying to engage her and negotiate on a variety of issues. She played her role very well and was quite difficult to negotiate with, but I persisted and tried to apply all of the new skills I am learning: discussing interests rather than positions, asking questions to understand her opinion, acknowledging and rephrasing her perspective, and brainstorming for creative solutions and ways to “expand the pie.”

After several minutes of negotiation, Seisei stopped us and she and Jeff gave us some feedback and pointers. All in all, it was a hugely helpful exercise, as well as a lot of fun. Since the Insight partners and associates are working abroad so much this summer, I hope that we will have enough time this summer to continue using each other as resources in training and coaching.

Make it happen!

Patrick McWhinney, Insight’s co-founder and CEO, was unfortunately not around during the Finalist Weekend and we weren’t expecting him until next week, so it was a nice surprise when he popped into the office this morning. After introductions and mutual expressions of shock at each others’ existence, we all went out for lunch. It felt a little bit like the interview process all over again, but any nervousness quickly subsided. It was great to talk, bounce some ideas off of him and hear some of his thoughts and perspectives on the Fellowship. Patrick has such a contagious positive energy and his life motto seems to be “make it happen!”—which was encouraging to hear as we talked about some of the challenges we’re facing as we enter week 3 of the Fellowship.

The first weeks

My first week as an Insight Fellow was a blur of orientation meetings, office organization and logistics, setting up my apartment, and settling into life in Boston. It was a busy week of ‘idea lists,’ ‘wish lists,’ lots of preliminary research, and long lunch hours spent getting to know my colleagues.

And then the second week began and the initial honeymoon period waned. The real substantive work started, with my first group and individual coaching sessions, and an introductory fundraising meeting. It was exhausting but exhilarating, overwhelming but exciting. I dove right in, not quite knowing how well I could swim. I managed to keep my head above water and found a good pace, as I gradually realized how much I had to do over the summer. In just three months, I have to structure my fellowship year, secure placements abroad, kick off a serious fundraising drive, and learn a whole new skill set in negotiation, mediation, and effective communication.

That list represents just the first of the fellowship’s three main goals. Additionally, I have to make some humanitarian contribution to the community as well as pursue self-reflection and personal development. However, the pursuit of these other goals has been hindered because, of course, I managed to severely sprain my ankle the day before starting the fellowship. Being on crutches has put off most of the activities on my summer wish list, not to mention the basic challenge of mobility—it certainly does not help that I am living in a fifth floor walk-up apartment! It was a bit demoralizing at first, as though the first weeks of the fellowship were not challenging enough. I felt like Seabiscuit, a racehorse with, quite literally, an unfairly high handicap. However, my coworkers, roommates, friends, and fellow Fellows have been wonderfully supportive and patient. In fact, everyone, from strangers on the street to cab drivers, has been incredibly friendly and helpful. I am almost tempted to keep my crutches for a bit longer just so I can continue getting preferential treatment!

Also, another advantage of my limited mobility has been the time I have been able to spend with myself, reflecting on the past year and the year ahead, thinking about my personal and professional life goals, and beginning to focus on the personal development aspect of the fellowship. I have spent a lot of time on my roof deck, admiring the beautiful view of Boston, Cambridge, and the Charles River, while quietly absorbed in thought.

However, after two weeks, I am impatient to really get this summer started beyond my apartment and the office. I want to explore Boston, sail on the river, practice yoga, take chess lessons, start learning Arabic, go to museums etc… But I cannot force my recovery, because I need to be in good shape for this year. As Seisei (a fellow Fellow) said, I have used up all my bad luck for the fellowship year, so hopefully it should all be uphill from here!

The Insight Fellowship

Life following my return from India was quite busy and stressful. I got caught up in looking for a job, going to interviews, and endlessly networking, as well as working as a restaurant hostess and part-time in my father's office. Finally at the end of March, I somehow got my *dream* job: a 2007 Insight Fellowship :)

The Insight Fellowship is a year-long fellowship program sponsored by the Insight Collaborative, a non-profit mediation, training, and consulting firm. The program is designed for young professionals in the field of conflict management and its purpose is to study and promote effective conflict management, make international humanitarian contributions, and pursue personal development. The fellowship year is split up into four three-month long placements: one in Boston, one at the International Criminal Court in The Hague, and the other two are decided by the Fellows according to our interests and respective research themes (see below for a more official explanation). At this point, my year looks like this: summer in Boston, fall in The Hague, winter in Thailand and spring in Lebanon.

Over the course of the fellowship year, as part of the 'self-development' aspect of the fellowship, I will be posting weekly journals and pictures on the Insight website (as well as here on my personal blog) so you can follow my experiences of living and working abroad.

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Official explanation of the Fellowship:

The Insight Fellowship Program was created in 2005 to foster a community of global-minded individuals prepared to manage conflict effectively and contribute to their local, national, and international communities. The Insight philosophy is that the ability to make positive contributions is a function of the quality of one’s communication skills, capacity for empathy, and self-understanding. To promote these qualities, one-year Insight Fellowships are awarded to exceptional individuals to:

* Study and promote effective conflict management;
* Make international humanitarian contributions; and
* Pursue self-reflection and personal development.

The Fellowship includes a $25,000 USD expense allowance to support multiple placements totaling one year, typically in three to four month blocks.
The first three-month placement is at the Boston offices of Insight Collaborative and its affiliate, Insight Partners. During this tenure in Boston, Fellows advance their understanding of the theory and practice of effective negotiation, communication, and mediation; meet pivotal figures in the field; attend workshops; receive personalized coaching; and see first-hand how international conflict management professionals operate in the academic, non-profit, and for-profit sectors.

Fellows will spend one three-month placement at the International Criminal Court in The Hague, subject to the Court’s permission. The remaining two placements of the Fellowship are divided into foreign placements proposed by the Fellow.